In all of my relationships that meant something to me, there has been a definitive moment when I realize that it is going to hurt if things fall apart. I had that moment yesterday.
In none of my past relationships have I ever had a moment when I thought, “Maybe we will make it,” a moment of reassurance, a moment when I stop fearing the worst. I had that moment yesterday.
The first moment was during a long, much needed hug. His arms were wrapped around me tightly and I felt as though nothing could touch us. We were the only people in the world and all the bad things would just bounce off of us. We were untouchable. And I thought, “I am going to be devastated if he chooses to leave.” So I hugged him a little tighter and hoped for the best.
The second moment came later in the night when I got a text from him that said, “I never thought I could love someone this much.” And that was it. I was reassured that he wasn’t going to leave. At least not anytime soon. And even though he’s told me that countless times before, it never stuck until I read those words. It was the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me and I felt my eyes well with tears of pure happiness and I felt like no girl could ever be as lucky as me. I’m going to do everything in my power to make this man the happiest he’s ever been for the rest of our lives.