What I learned this weekend, is sometimes you have to let it all out.
Coming from someone who doesn’t like to show vulnerability, who hates to cry in front of people and generally releases emotions through writing or yoga, I hate to admit it but sometimes it’s best to just let it go.
Let your head fall, you’ve been holding it up high all day, take a break.
Feel the chin start to quiver, the lump in your throat start to form.
Take deep breaths thinking that that might help prevent the tears from forming.
Let the inevitable tears form and more importantly, let them fall.
Just let it flow out of your eyes.
In my case, I was laying down so I ended up with tears in my ears and black eye liner marks all over. It was my extreme smoky eye look.
I didn’t think I really needed to let it go. I had done everything that I thought would help to make sure that I didn’t cry. And it’s true I didn’t cry while I was doing all of those things, but somehow, I still did.
And I was lucky enough to have an amazing person there with me to comfort me and hold me. He kept wanting me to talk about it, about why I was crying and what was going on in my head. I told him that it’s so much easier to think about things and just let them stay in your head than to say them out loud. But I did anyways. And it made the tears fall faster and my chin quiver more and my voice shakier. But I said them nonetheless.
And then I was joking around with him and started crying again. It confused us both but I just had to go with it.
Sometimes you just have to go with the tears.