Tomorrow at 12:30 I will sit at a desk and take a test. This is not my first test and it definitely won’t be the last. However, this is probably one of the most important tests I will take. Far too much is dependent upon this test. Far too much is dependent upon the number that they will give me.
I am lucky enough to have recieved quite a bit of encouragement from a range of people. And I greatly appreciate that. However, I think something that society lacks and that we aren’t taught in life is how to create a back-up plan. “You’re going to do great,” and “I believe in you” can only go so far. What happens if I don’t do so great? No one ever sits down with someone and says, “I know you’re going to do great and I have so much faith in you, BUT let’s think about all the possibilities. Let’s think about a plan for if things don’t go the way you would like. Let’s think about how we can lighten that blow, because if we don’t you’re going to have one hell of a time trying to forgive yourself for not doing so well.”
It’s very surreal that it’s tomorrow. For quite some time now I’ve heard and told myself, “You have time.” But now, I’m out of time. In less than 24 hours I will be finished with this test that has consumed much of my life for over a year. And what do I do if the score isn’t what I wanted? Step one: cry. Step two: Go to sleep. Step three: Wake up and think. Step four: Figure out what I want to do with my life and try to figure out the steps I need to get there.
I just don’t know if I’m strong enough to do so.
All I can do now is get a good night’s sleep, eat a good breakfast, show up and hope that my best is good enough.
And if it’s not, I will need a lot of help. And love. And support.
Good luck to anyone else taking the June LSAT.